There's Something About Mary Hathaway
a Pirates of the Caribbean story
by Superimmunegirl
There was something about Mary Hathaway, Jack mused to himself as he swigged his rum in Mary's inn, The Pelican. She'd come along a couple of years ago and bought the place that was almost too filthy and run down even for Jack and his crew, and turned it into the closest thing that Puerto de las Pulgas had to a fine establishment. Jack came out of curiosity at first, but soon, despite her high prices, he came because of Mary.
Half the men he knew had crushes on her, but no one to Jack's knowledge had actually slept with her. At a rumored forty years old with lines of silver in her dark hair, she was not young; nor was she especially beautiful. But still...Jack sighed. There was something about her, her ample hips and breasts, her trim waist with the clean apron tied neatly around, her strong arms, her manner so competent and business- like, yet still merry and kind. She wore a wedding ring but her husband was still in England. Eventually she had to take a lover, Jack insisted to himself, and it ought to be him. He watched her as she worked, chatting amiably with her customers and supervising the serving wenches. She was so busy she never had time to exchange more than a few pleasantries with any one sailor--Jack included, to his regret. He'd tried his best to charm a bit more attention out of her, but she seemed immune to his efforts. She always bustled off to her next customer with a warm smile and an affectionate hand upon his shoulder, making her even more maddeningly desirable. He'd been determined to talk more with her this time even if he had to stay up all night to do it.
However, his body was not cooperating. He'd been coming down with a cold since that afternoon. At first he had been able to chase away his sore throat and general achiness with rum, but his symptoms were becoming more insistent. But he wasn't about to let a cold get in the way of seducing Mary. All he had to do was wait until most of her customers were gone and then she'd finally have time to talk to him. Wincing at his sore throat, he reached for the nearly empty bottle and finished it. Hopefully he wouldn't be too drunk by that time.
He sniffled and rubbed at his runny nose. He had been plagued with a sneezy feeling for the last two hours, but couldn't seem to actually sneeze. The fumes of the rum aggravated the feeling, and he inhaled slowly.
"Ahhh...ahhhh...ah, damn (sniff)."
"Something wrong, Jack?" asked Avery Miles, a new crewmember.
"No, nothing," he said, wiping his nose yet again with a damp handkerchief. "Let's get summore rum over here." He gestured to a serving girl and then the tickle hit him again. His breathing slowed as he concentrated on the feeling in his nose. "Haahh...ah...ah...(sniff)...ahaaa...ahahh...atchOOOOOO! AhhTCHUUMMPHH!
HatchOOOOMMPPHH!" he sneezed dramatically into the handkerchief.
"Goodness! God bless you," said a low, sweet, woman's voice at his elbow. He looked up, nose still buried in the handkerchief, and saw Mary setting a fresh bottle of rum on the table.
"Oh, hullo Bary," Jack said through the handkerchief. He blushed at having the object of his affections see him in such an awkward moment. He hesitated to blow his nose, but he had no choice, and emptied his sinuses rather noisily.
"Dear me, you didn't sound like that when you came in. Are you getting sick?"
"Nah, (sniff) I'm alright, love," he slurred, trying to look and sound healthy. "Ferpectly--perfectly fine." He suddenly regretted having had quite so much rum--he was drunker than he thought. This wasn't going well at all.
"Well, you don't sound fine. And you don't look too well, either," she said, peering at him more closely.
"Jus' a slight case of the sniffles, Mary, really." He smiled his most charming smile at her, desperately hoping to salvage the situation, but she continued to look suspicious. She wiped her hands on her apron and felt his forehead. She frowned as her suspicions were confirmed.
"The sniffles, indeed. You're feverish. You've caught a bad cold, Jack, and you should be in bed," she scolded.
"But I--"
"But nothing! Honestly, you're a grown man. You should know better than to stay up all night drinking when you're ill. Are you trying to catch your death?"
"But I really don' feel that bad," he protested.
"Well, if that's so, it's only because you're too drunk to feel much of anything. Now come along, you're going straight to bed." Jack clearly had no choice, and his crew laughed heartily at his predicament.
"Go on then, Jack, she's right, you know," said Avery.
"Alright, I'm going," he said, and rose a bit unsteadily. His head was throbbing and he suspected it was not the rum. Mary took his arm and guided him upstairs.
Mary took him to a room next to hers. "It's best to have your own room when you're sick," she said. "You can rest better, and your crew mates are less likely to catch what you've got." She sat him on the bed. "Now, when did this come on?"
"My throat started hurting this afternoon. Hurts pretty bad now," Jack said, giving up all pretense that he was in good health.
"Let me take a look," she said, and peered at his throat. Her hand was cool and gentle on his neck and he could feel the heat of her skin and smell her intoxicating scent. It was sweet, like fresh laundry scented with lavender, but with undertones of something musky and enticing. He shifted position so that she would not see the growing bulge in his trousers. "Hmmm. That does look sore. Any other symptoms?"
"Jus' the runny nose. And a headache. And--well, everything sort of hurts," he admitted.
"Poor lad," she said, stroking his hair. "All right, then. I want you to get into bed, and I'll be up in just a bit with some hot tea and a dose of medicine."
"You don' have to do that, love--"
"Nonsense. I always look after my guests, even when they're too foolish, or stubborn, or drunk to look after themselves." This last bit of scolding was softened with a smile, and she disappeared downstairs.
Jack undressed as he was told. He shivered as the unexpectedly chill air touched his skin...he supposed he really did have a fever. He got under the covers, blew his nose again, and then let the full realization of his situation wash over him. He was ill, and Mary Hathaway was taking care of him. He began grinning uncontrollably. Mary Hathaway was taking care of him! He finally had her all to himself. And she clearly had feelings for him; she had probably just been waiting for an opportunity to show it. He gave a self-satisfied chuckle, which turned into a cough, adding another item to his growing list of symptoms.
Soon Mary returned, bearing a steaming mug of tea and carrying a medicine bottle and a spoon in her apron pocket. She set down the tea and poured out a dose of medicine.
"This is good for a feverish cold," she said. "It doesn't taste very nice, I'm afraid." She tucked the spoon into his open mouth and handed him the mug as he grimaced.
"Here, this will wash away the taste, and it should help your sore throat too."
"Thanks," he said, sniffling. He sipped the tea--it was sweet and tasted of lemons and ginger. "You're a good woman, Mary...UH-UUUH-TCHOOO!"
"God bless you. I brought you a few extra handkerchiefs, in case you need them."
"I think I probably will," he said ruefully, and blew his nose. She smiled sympathetically and patted his knee.
"You'd best be getting to sleep now. I'll come to see how you're feeling in the morning. Just knock on my door if you need anything." And with that, she pulled the covers up around him and kissed him on the forehead. "Good night, Jack."
Gibbs wandered into the Pelican mid-morning. He'd worked on the ship with a few other crewmembers `til late in the night and had slept there. The leak they'd sprung the day before was patched up enough to make it to Port Royal, where they would get it fixed properly. He found his other mates in the tavern room, looking like they'd just gotten up.
"Morning lads, Anna. Did ye all have a good time while I was working me fingers to the bone last night?"
"We did," grinned Anna Maria. "Thanks for that, Gibbs."
"You're bloody welcome. Where's Jack?"
"Haven't seen him yet. He's probably still in bed; he's got a cold."
"Yeah?" He was not terribly surprised; Jack had let loose with several prodigious sneezes yesterday when they were working in the hold together, but he had blamed it on the musty air.
"Aye," said Avery. "He had a fever last night and Mary made him go to bed. He might be up by now, if you want to check."
"Yeah, I will. We should go soon if we can; I don't want to have to bail out again."
Gibbs headed upstairs and knocked on Jack's door.
"Cobe id," called a voice that was at least an octave lower than Jack's usual tone. Jack blew into one of Mary's handkerchiefs to clear his head, and Gibbs laughed when he saw Jack's swollen, red nose.
"Christ, mate, you look awful. Bad cold, eh?"
"Yeah," Jack agreed, but he was grinning.
"I heard Mary sent you to bed," Gibbs said meaningfully.
"That she did. I was going to stay up late to try and talk to her when things quieted down. I didn't want to let on that I felt bad, but she found me out and ordered me into bed. Gave me a good scolding, too." "A scolding! Ah, what I'd give to get a scolding from Mary," he sighed wistfully. Gibbs had tried as hard as Jack to get some attention from her.
"It was something to see. She had her hands on her hips and everything. Then she gave me hot tea and medicine and tucked me into bed. She even kissed me."
"On the lips?!" exclaimed Gibbs, jealously.
"No, on the forehead. But it's just a matter of time." He laughed. "She wants me, Gibbs! She came in to check on me first thing this morning. Says she wants me to stay here until my fever is down."
"Well, of course. She's a motherly person. She'd do the same for anybody who's sick."
"You're just jealous. What it is, is that she's wanted me all along, but she's a proper woman, and she hasn't known how to show it, savvy? This is her excuse. I'll be bedding her within two days."
"Jack, we can't be here for two days. That patch is temporary; it isn't going to hold. I'm not doing it again, and I'm sure as hell not bailing her out."
"Well, just have Guzman's boys do it."
"I thought you said you didn't trust the Spaniards!"
"Yeah, well, I've got to open me mind, haven't I? Give `em a chance. John Knuckles said good things about them. Go on and see what they say, anyway."
"Fine," Gibbs said darkly. Jack began coughing and Gibbs shook his head. It wasn't bloody fair. He was sure that Jack was wrong about Mary--she'd do the same for Gibbs if he got sick. He imagined her fussing over him as he sniffled and sneezed, laying a tender, caring hand on his cheek...he inched a little closer to Jack.
"Bloody hell," Jack swore as the coughing subsided. Then he got a glazed look in his eyes and his breath hitched. Gibbs moved a bit closer still. "Ah--ah-- ahhhTCHOOO! Huh-CHOOO!" Jack blew his nose vigorously, wiped, and then noticed Gibbs. "Hey, what are you doing so close?"
"Close?"
"Oh, don't act so innocent, I know what you're up to!" Jack accused, drawing away.
"I don't know what you're talking about, mate."
"Yes you do. Well, clear off: you can't have me cold. Think of your own idea if you want to get close to Mary."
"You didn't think of anything Jack--you just got sick! I hope you do keep your bloody cold to yourself. It would be a first." He rose, shaking his head as if Jack had gone mad. "I'll find out what Guzman has to say, and I'll let you know." His hand was almost to the door when there was a knock, and Gibbs opened the door to find Mary holding a basin of water and a cloth.
"Good morning, Gibbs! Come to cheer up your fallen comrade?"
"Uh--yeah." He turned to look at Jack and saw that the smug grin had been replaced by a look of patient, noble suffering.
"Poor thing's really miserable," she confided. "Jack, it's getting so hot I thought a cool cloth on your forehead might make you feel better and bring your fever down."
"That sounds wonderful...but you shouldn't (cough) go to such trouble, love," Jack said weakly.
"Nonsense, it's no trouble at all," she said, and began ministering to him. While Mary was smoothing the cloth over his forehead, Jack shot Gibbs the smug look again, and Gibbs turned away, disgusted.
Gibbs went down to the tavern and told the crew what Jack's orders were.
"I don't want to do it, I've spent enough time on this stupid thing," Gibbs groused, although it was not the leaky ship that was the source of his resentment.
"I'll go," said Anna Maria. "I speak better Spanish anyway."
"Thanks, love," he said, and sat down to have a morning mug of ale. Thinking of the scene he had just witnessed, he was filled with jealousy. It wasn't fair. Jack got all the young, pretty ones; did he have to get Mary too? Gibbs had thought he had a chance with her. Once again he allowed himself to imagine that it was he and not Jack who had the cold. She'd be so sweet to him, so concerned... she'd feel his forehead and stroke his hair, playing the nurse, but soon her flushed cheeks and trembling hands would give away her secret desire for him. He'd take her into his arms and she'd melt into his embrace...
He came to himself and felt even gloomier. He picked up a set of darts and started throwing them at a well-worn target.
"Hey, Gibbs! I thought you were shipping out." Gibbs looked up to see John Knuckles come in the door.
"Yeah, well, we got delayed. Seems Jack finally found a way to get some attention from Mary."
"Yeah? What's that?"
"He got sick," Gibbs said disgustedly, throwing a bull's eye.
John laughed. "I could have told him that. She's got a real soft spot there. Not serious, I hope?"
"Nah, just a bad cold."
"What, are you jealous? Cheer up; maybe you'll come down with it too," he joked.
"Well, I hope not. I'm not fool enough to want to catch cold just to get a little time with Mary," Gibbs lied.
"No, of course not. Well, I'm looking for Sarah; is she here?"
"Yeah, I think she's out back."
"Thanks then. I'll be seeing you." John wandered off, and Gibbs rose up to pull his darts from the target. He reached up and without warning--"ATISHHHHHHOOO!!!" --he sneezed violently. He blinked and sniffed, a bit dazed by the force of the sudden sneeze. Then a slow smile spread across his face.
The rest of that day, Jack spent in bed, alternating between tending his suffering nose and sleeping. He truly had a miserable cold--he couldn't remember the last time he'd had one this bad--but thoughts of finally possessing Mary kept him in good spirits between sneezes. She was so sweet and attentive when she looked in on him, that he knew she liked him--and yet his efforts to turn their interaction into a seductive one seemed to go nowhere. Ah, well, he thought, give her time--she's probably never slept with anyone but her husband, and it might take some time to overcome her morals. But that was all right--Jack could be patient when he needed to be, and as bad as his cold was, there seemed to be no rush.
While Jack lay abed, the rest of the crew went about their business, visiting, taking care of ship's business, and hanging out at the tavern. Gibbs visited a number of acquaintances and business associates, looking for information on plum shipments they could commandeer. But through all his doings, Gibbs couldn't stop thinking about his health. That sneeze at the dartboard could have been nothing. But he fervently hoped that, like Jack's sneezes in the hold yesterday, it was a sign of something more to come. As he went about his day, he watched carefully for other signs of illness. He kept swallowing and clearing his throat, wondering if it was becoming scratchy. He wasn't sure, but he thought it might be. A couple of hours later, while he was in conversation with a crooked merchant, another encouraging sneeze came-- "AAATISHHOOO!!!" Not long afterwards, a pair of sneezes left him sniffling and reaching for his hanky. At this point he realized, to his delight, that he really was developing a sore throat. Then his nose started to run. The pain in his throat got steadily worse, and the sneezes started coming fast and thick. There was no doubt about it: Gibbs was coming down with a terrible cold.
The question was, what to do about it? If he was to get Mary's attention, he couldn't just quietly go to bed--although by dinnertime, he really wanted to. And he didn't know how Mary would react if he complained to her about his cold. Somehow, he wanted her to notice he was sick and to scold him as she had scolded Jack. So he decided to simply hang around the tavern until she did.
Unfortunately, that was easier said than done. She was, as always, very busy, and barely had time to say hello to Gibbs, let alone notice that he was sniffling. She spent most of her time in the kitchen, and the few times she did appear, he could neither coax a sneeze out of his tickly nose nor blow his it loudly enough for her to notice. He actually didn't sound that sick, but by this time, he really felt it. He felt shivery, achy and tired, and his throat hurt badly. He was alone, as the other crewmembers had gone off to neighboring whorehouses (for Mary permitted no whoring in her own establishment). He pushed away the remains of the dinner he couldn't finish and buried his head in his hands, rubbing his aching temples. "Hahh... HATCHOOO! HATCHOOOOO!" he sneezed, and wiped his nose, which was dripping now. His spirits lifted when he saw Anna Maria walk in, but then she stopped to talk to Mary. Talked for quite a bit. One of them must have cracked a joke, because they both burst out laughing. Ah, but he wanted to make her laugh like that.
"Hey Gibbs, where are the others?" Anna Maria said when she finally arrived at his table.
"Some of them went off to the Red Rose, and some went to Juana la Gata's."
"Yeah? And you stayed here so you could moon over Mary?" He gave her a dirty look, and she laughed. "Oh, you've got it bad, Gibbs, you and Jack both. Well, I've got a bit of gossip that might make you feel better. Do you know the story with Mary's husband, and why she left?"
"Something to do with her daughter being over here, isn't it?" said Gibbs. He rubbed his runny nose and fought back another sneeze. It wasn't his usual habit to hide being sick, but if Anna Maria found out, she'd probably send him off to bed, and he wanted Mary to do that.
"Yeah, the girl ran off with a sailor when she was sixteen. She was Mary's only kid that lived more than a year, and it nearly broke her heart when she left. So a year later Mary gets a letter from her --she's out here in Puerto de las Pulgas with a new baby, her husband's always at sea, and she's at her wit's end. So Mary drops her husband, the tavern they ran together and everything, and comes out to be with her daughter."
"So what about her husband?" asked Gibbs.
"Well, it seems it wasn't a big sacrifice to leave him. She married him to please her family when she was very young, she barely knew him, and they never really took to each other. Says he's got no intention of coming out here, and she's not going back." "So she has left her husband. Then why does she still wear her wedding ring?" "I don't know. Probably to keep the riff-raff at bay. But in any event, she's as good as single."
"Where'd you get this from?" "From her, earlier this afternoon...are you feeling all right, Gibbs?" Gibbs realized he'd been rubbing his aching head again.
"Yeah, just a bit of a headache," he replied. "You're sniffling, too. You must be getting Jack's cold."
"Nah, I'm all right," he said, wiping his nose.
"You are not. What are you--oh, I know what you want," she said knowingly. "Hey Mary, come over here!" she called across the room.
"Oh, bugger, don't--" he said, hiding his head again.
"What is it, love?" asked Mary, when she got to their table.
"We got another stubborn one here; says he's not sick, but he looks it to me. I think he's got what Jack's got."
"Well, what about it, Gibbs? Are you sick?" she asked.
"I guess I might be coming down with something," he mumbled, suddenly shy. She felt his forehead and sighed.
"Well, you've got a fever too. Really, you're as bad as Jack! I don't understand you two. Why can't you be sensible and go to bed when you're ill instead of waiting to be told? Come along, I'll put you in with Jack." Gibbs complied, hardly believing his good fortune. He struggled to look unhappy, but when Mary laid her hand comfortingly on his shoulder, it was all he could do to keep a big, silly grin off his face. He threw a grateful look back at Anna Maria, which she acknowledged with a wink.
"I've got company for you, Jack," said Mary as she led in her latest patient. "Gibbs is sick, too." Gibbs sat down wearily on the second of two beds and blew his nose, playing it up a bit. Jack gave him a look that could kill. Mary looked down Gibbs' throat and stroked his hair sympathetically. She took the bottle of medicine-- Jack's medicine!--from the bedside table and gave Gibbs a dose of it.
"Does he have to be in here?" Jack said. "He snores."
"Unfortunately, I don't have any other rooms free. Anyway, I'm sure you snore too, with your nose as stuffed up as it is. And look at the bright side: you'll be able to keep each other company."
"Ahhhhh--ACHOOOO!" sneezed Gibbs.
"God bless you, dear," she said, patting him on the shoulder. "Go ahead and get into bed, that's right. Here's a nice cool cloth for your forehead--it's miserable having a fever when it's so hot."
"Thank you Mary," Gibbs said weakly, enjoying the sight of Mary's ample cleavage as she leaned over him. Gibbs favored Jack with the same smug look Jack had worn earlier. "Now, let's see how your fever is doing, Jack." She laid a hand on his cheek, then his forehead, and smiled. "Well, it looks like it's come down! You must be feeling better."
"Uh...yeah, a little," he said reluctantly.
"I'm glad to hear it. I'd say you're well enough to come down to the tavern for a bit tonight. We're having some musicians in from León. They're very good. " "Yeah, that sounds great," he said, but he was far from happy. He by no means wanted to relinquish his status as Mary's patient, especially with Gibbs ready to fill the role. But he didn't want to appear lazy or weak either.
When Mary left and was out of earshot, Jack turned to face his friend.
"Just what the hell do you think you're doing, mate?" asked Jack.
"I'm not doing anything," said Gibbs.
"Yes you are. You're trying to-oohh--atchOOOO! HetchOOOO! (sniff) You're trying to get between me and Mary."
"You're dreaming," Gibbs snorted. "I didn't try to catch your cold. You gave it to me, like you always do. It's not my fault if Mary seems to be paying special attention to me."
"She isn't, she's treating you the same as she's been treating me."
"Funny, you said she was treating you so good because she wants to bed you. Maybe she wants to bed both of us."
"She doesn't."
"As you say. Anyway, I'm sick, I feel like shite and I'm going to sleep," said Gibbs, turning over and pulling the sheet over him. His face hidden from Jack's view, he smiled a blissful smile, recalling the sight of Mary's breasts and the touch of her hand on his feverish cheek.
Soon Gibbs was asleep, and snoring loudly as Jack had predicted. Jack sat and fumed. He hadn't gotten anywhere with Mary today, and he wouldn't get another chance with Gibbs there to interfere. And as soon as he left, he had no doubt that his friend would be doing everything he could to work his way into Mary's heart. Or at least her skirts. Eventually he heard the music strike up downstairs. Bored to death from being in bed all day, he threw off the covers, got dressed, and ventured downstairs.
"Jack!" his crewmates called when he entered the tavern. "He lives!"
"How are you feeling?" asked Anna Maria.
"Like I got a nasty cold in me head," he replied.
"God, you sound even worse. You sure you should be up?"
"S'all right, Mary says my fever's down, and anyway, I'm bored as hell. I thought I could do with a bit of my kind of medicine--pass it over this way." They laughed and handed him the bottle of rum, and he took a good, long swig. As the music played and the night continued, Jack tried to engage Mary in conversation whenever she appeared. He hoped that she might be more receptive, but it was no different than before. He hadn't had enough time to properly seduce her. Glumly he sat, drank his rum, and attended to his runny, stuffy, sneezy nose. When his body began to insist that it was time to rest again, he ignored it. Perhaps his cold would get worse if he stayed up. Then maybe he'd have another chance. But Mary was too vigilant.
"Back to bed, Jack," she said, visiting their table. "You're still quite sick, and you've got to take it easy if you want to get better." It was the most she had spoken to him all night.
"Listen to you, trying to get me into bed all the time," he said, his voice a seductive purr. She rolled her eyes.
"Oh yes, because I can't resist a man with a streaming head cold. Up with you. Now," she said. He obeyed, and said good night to his drunken crew.
Gibbs was still snoring when Jack entered the room. Tired as Jack was from his cold, he could not sleep with the noise. But he also heard a more welcome sound: the rising of the wind and the rumble of thunder. Jack smiled. He liked a good storm, and the rain would break the heat that they'd been suffering. Somehow he managed to doze off, but then awakened to a great crack of thunder. He rose, and went to the window. The rain poured down in buckets and the wind howled. Suddenly an idea occurred to Jack. What if he went out in the storm and got himself good and soaked? That might make his cold worse, and then Mary wouldn't hear of him getting up! And maybe tomorrow Gibbs would be better. Without Gibbs around, he'd make his move with Mary and make it count. Impulsively he threw his clothes on and snuck out the back door into the storm.
The rain soaked him to the skin in a matter of seconds. His first thought was to stay out there for at least a half hour, but the rain was colder than he expected. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and shivered in the wind. His better sense began to suggest that he was being completely stupid, and eventually, the rest of him agreed. However, it looked like the cook was just inside the door, and Jack did not want to be seen, so he waited. Not soon enough, the man's shadow moved from the window, and it looked like he was heading upstairs. Jack took the opportunity and made for the door. When he reached it, it was barred.
Jack swore. It couldn't be that late, why was he locking the door now? Jack calmed himself, knowing that there were many ways around a lock. Unfortunately, most of them required tools, and he didn't have anything on him. As the rain streamed down and into his eyes, he looked around the yard for what he could find. There was a rusty saw that he couldn't fit through the crack to lift the bar, and that was about it. By this time, Jack's teeth were chattering. "Uhhh...huhhhh...ACHOOO!" he sneezed helplessly into the rain. "AHHHH--TISHOOOO! TISSHOOO!" He rubbed his nose, shivered, and snuffled miserably. He would have to knock. Then he'd have to explain himself to Mary. Well, that's all right, he said to himself, he could come up with some kind of story, he was Captain Jack Sparrow! Unfortunately, Captain Jack Sparrow was sick and stuffed up and chilled to the bone, which seemed to dull his thinking. The only plausible lies he could think of involved him having a rendezvous with another woman, and that wouldn't do at all. Just when he was contemplating the possibilities of shimmying up a palm tree that nodded in front of his window, he saw a shadow moving at the window next to his. He peered through the rain: it was Anna Maria, he was sure. He searched for pebbles on the ground, and after a few throws, got her attention. Anna Maria opened the window and peered out.
"Jack? What--"
He shushed her desperately, and gestured for her to come let him in. She closed the window and was at the door in a moment.
"What the hell are you doing out here?" she hissed. "You're soaked--and you're shivering!"
"I know, I got locked out," he replied as she ushered him inside.
"Well what were you doing out there in the first place, with no cloak or anything! Don't you know that you're sick?"
"I know, it's just--it's a long story, love...can we go up to your room?"
They headed up to her room and he begged her to get his clothes from his.
She did, and while he stripped off his wet things and dried off, she went to the kitchen and fetched him a hot rum.
"Don't think you can get away with not explaining this to me, because you can't," she informed him.
"Well (sniff)...promise not to tell Mary?"
"I'm not promising anything. But I will definitely tell her about this if you don't tell me what happened."
"Oh God...It's just--well, I was starting to feel better, and I know that if I'm not in that room, Gibbs is going to try something with Mary, and I wanted a little more time to make me own move. So I--I thought if I went out in the rain me cold might get worse again--I knew it was stupid as soon as I went out there, but then the cook was there, and then the door was locked--"
"So you went out there to try to make yourself worse? Jack, that's--"
"I said I knew it was stupid! But I...ahhhh...AHCHOOOO! ATCHOOOO! Heh- TCHOOO! Snrfff--Adda, do you hab a hadkerchief?" His was soaked. Looking concerned and exasperated, she found him one. As he blew, she wrapped a blanket around his shoulders.
"For God's sake, Jack, the woman either likes you or she doesn't. There's no need for all this scheming, and it's not worth making yourself ill." "It's odly a cold, love. I'll be fide." "A cold can turn nasty on you. Remember Bootstrap's brother?" Jack did. A strong, strapping man, he had died of a simple cold that had settled in his chest.
"I (sniff) know, you're right. I shouldn't have done it. I'll be good from now on."
"Good," said Anna Maria, and she kissed him affectionately. "Don't you get so hung up on this one woman. You know there are dozens of girls out there who are dying to have you."
"Yeah?" said Jack, arms encircling her waist and pulling her onto his lap. "Are you one of them?"
"Ha! Last time I had you, you were gone in the morning and so was my boat. I haven't forgiven you enough to fuck you again."
"Ah, but you've forgiven me enough to kiss me," he noted mischievously, pulling her closer.
"So I have," she replied, and met his lips again. He parted her warm lips with his tongue. They exchanged several playful, tender kisses, which grew increasingly passionate. His hands began to explore her lithe body, but after a few moments of this, she drew away. "I've forgiven you enough to kiss you," she said, slightly breathless, "but that's about it."
"Well, I'll take what I can get," he sighed.
"You're going to have to," she said, straightening her clothes. "Now, off to bed with you. And stay there!"
"Yes, ma'am."
Jack quietly snuck into bed, not waking Gibbs. The man was not snoring much at the moment, for which Jack was thankful. But as Jack pulled the covers over himself, he heard Gibbs groan pitifully. Jack looked over at his first mate. A moment passed in silence, and then Gibbs moaned and muttered again, and coughed. Probably just having a bad dream, Jack reassured himself, but having been freshly reminded of Bootstrap's brother's death, he needed to make sure. He got up and put his hand on Gibb's forehead--he was feverish, but not seriously so.
"Gibbs," he said, shaking him gently. "You all right?"
"Huhh..."
"Having a bad dream, mate?"
"Uh...yeah..."
"Well, you're all right, now. Go on back to sleep."
"Yeah...thanks..." he said, still more asleep than awake. Jack went back to bed, glad that Gibbs was all right. It was a good reminder of the friendship he felt for the man, despite their current rivalry. Still, Jack thought, pulling the covers around him, it didn't mean he was going to let him win.
When Jack awoke the next morning, he realized with a groan that he had succeeded in his nocturnal adventure. His cold was definitely worse. His head was completely stuffed, the aches and shivery feeling had returned, and his chest was dreadfully congested. When Mary came in, bearing breakfast, she was dismayed to find Jack feverish again.
"I shouldn't have let you get up so soon," she fretted, her hand on his cheek. "I thought you'd be all right, but...I'm sorry, I'm afraid you'll have to stay in bed again today. And I think I'll say the same for you, Gibbs, even though your fever is almost gone." Jack groaned inwardly. He had not anticipated that.
"Well, if you really think it's necessary..." said Gibbs, clearly delighted.
"I do think it's best. I also think you both need to inhale some steam--you're so stuffed up I can hardly understand either of you. Eat your breakfast, and I'll boil some water with herbs." She went back downstairs.
"Convenient relapse, Jack," said Gibbs, in between mouthfuls of porridge. "How'd you manage that?"
"Just lucky, I guess," he replied, coughing.
"Hmmph." They finished their breakfasts, and then Mary came up with a big kettle of water and some towels. She made them both sit up and poured boiling water with herbs into bowls and draped towels around their heads so that they could inhale the steam. Then she left them alone. They sat in silence for several minutes.
"Well," came Jack's muffled voice from under the towel, "This is a bit humiliating."
"It is," agreed Gibbs. He snuffled. "Seems to help, though."
"It does," Jack admitted.
When the steam cooled down and they emerged from under their towels, Gibbs got out of bed and put his trousers on.
"Where are you going?" asked Jack.
"The privy," he replied.
"Sick as you are, and you still can't just use the chamber pot." Jack always poked fun at Gibbs for his need for privacy during his morning routine, and also the inordinate amount of time it took him to complete the process. You could count on him being occupied for a good half-hour.
"Sorry to deprive you of the fun of watching," Gibbs replied, accustomed to Jack's ribbing.
"I was counting on it for me morning's entertainment," he continued. "Well, enjoy."
Gibbs left, and then it dawned on Jack: Gibbs would be gone for a half-hour. That just might be enough.
"Sorry to (cough) bother you, Mary," Jack asked at the kitchen door.
"Not at all, do you need something?"
"I (cough) can't seem to stop coughing, love. I thought some more of that tea might help." It was a convenient truth, and he succumbed to another deep coughing spell.
"You poor dear, that sounds dreadful. I'll bring you up some tea, but I think what you really need is some St. Benedict's ointment on your chest. You get back into bed and I'll be up in a moment."
"Thanks, Mary," he said, rejoicing and silently begging her to hurry.
Mary arrived at his bedside with tea and ointment not ten minutes later.
"There you are," she said, setting down the tea. "Now-- where's Gibbs?"
"In the privy."
"Ah. Well, now, take off your shirt and we'll get some of this ointment on."
Jack obeyed, trying not to appear too eager. She opened the jar, scooped out some pungent medicine, and smoothed it over his chest. In gentle circles she rubbed, starting at his collarbone and working downwards. Her lovely breasts were so enticingly close, and he could feel the heat from her body. A tendril of her hair tickled his nose, and he had to make a desperate grab for his handkerchief.
"HAtchoo! Achooo!" he sneezed, and blew his sore nose yet again.
"God bless you," she said, and continued her work. Her fingers slid over his sensitive nipples, which were hard with desire. She must know what she was doing to him, the minx! Emboldened, he reached up and slid his hand up the remarkable curve of her waist and towards those breasts he had so longed to touch.
Not pausing in her task, she promptly removed it.
"Don't get fresh, Jack," she said. There was nothing ambiguous or coy in her tone. Jack was discouraged, but would not give up so quickly. Clearly it was time to lay it all on the line.
"Ah, love, don't say no. You'll break me heart."
"Oh, indeed?"
"You're so beautiful, Mary, so kind...you're the most wonderful woman, and I can't stop thinking about you."
"Oh, for goodness' sake. You're Jack Sparrow; you'll stop thinking of me as soon as you pull into another port, I promise you."
"It's not like that, Mary, it's different with you. Ye can't say no--I'm smitten with ye. I'm in love."
"In love?" She shook her head, smiling. "Jack, if you're at all interested in me, it's only because I'm one of the few halfway decent looking women in Puerto de las Pulgas who doesn't charge."
"No, Mary, it's more than that--I mean--"
"More than that?" she laughed. "Oh, Jack, dear, you'd better quit while you're ahead."
"But--"
"The answer is no," she said firmly but kindly. She finished with the ointment and handed him back his shirt. Reluctantly, he put it back on, and she pulled the sheet up over his chest. "That should help your cough. Now drink your tea, dear, and try to get some rest." And with that, she left.
Moments later, Gibbs returned, passing Mary in the hall. Silently he cursed Jack. He should have known that his captain would try something. But when he entered the sick room, one look at Jack's face told him that it had not gone well. Gibb's heart leapt and he smiled giddily as he climbed back into his bed. He had a chance after all!
"Well, I'm sick of this," Jack announced, after a period of sullen silence. He threw off the covers. "I'm going out."
"Where are you going?"
"I dunno. Downstairs, out to the ship--anywhere but here in this room," he said, pulling on his clothes.
"All right," said Gibbs, perplexed. In normal circumstances he'd tell Jack to be patient, stay in bed, and nurse his cold. But these were not normal circumstances.
Once Jack left, Gibbs tried to think of some scheme to get Mary alone. But before he could, Mary came on her own accord.
"Hello Gibbs, I--where's Jack?"
"Uh--in the privy," he lied. If he told her the truth, she would be sure to find Jack and send him back to bed.
"Oh. Well, I noticed you were low on this medicine, so here's a fresh bottle," she said, setting it down. "It's the last one, so I'll have to make some more. How are you feeling?" she asked.
"A little better, love, thanks to you," he said.
"Oh, I haven't done much. Rest works wonders." She felt his cheek. "Yes, I think your fever's gone now."
"Mary," he said, covering her hand with his. "I've got to tell you this. Ever since I sah-- ahhhhh...ATCHUMMMPPHH!"
"God bless you."
"Thanks--" He quickly blew his nose, and tried again. "Ever since I first saw you, I've wanted to-oohhhh..ahh... HATCHOOOOOOOO!"
"God bless you. I'm sorry, you've wanted to what?"
"To--ah, God--just a minute--ahh...ah... ATCHHHHHOOOOOO! ATCHOOOOO! Ugh..."
He blew his nose once more, and, despairing but determined, made one more try.
"I've wanted to have you, to have you for me own. Oh, Mary..." he said, pulling her close. But she pulled back.
"Gibbs, no, I'm sorry. I'm not interested."
"But why? I'm a good man, I'll treat you right...make you feel good..."
"It's out of the question. I quite like you, but not in that way, and in any event I'm a married woman."
"But you left your husband," he said, a bit plaintively.
"I didn't leave him, I just...left. You should look to someone who's free."
"There's no one like you, Mary," he said dejectedly.
"Oh, come now, don't take it like that. There are plenty of nice girls out there. I happen to know a pretty young woman who fancies you quite a bit."
"Yeah? Who?" he asked, still dejected but curious.
"One of my girls. Mavis."
"Mavis? The black girl? She's too young for me."
"She's older than she looks. You should talk to her sometime." And with that, she gathered her things and left.
It wasn't too long before Jack came back.
"Where'd you go?" asked Gibbs, wiping his nose after a big sneeze.
"Not far, just laid out in one of the hammocks out back. The sun moved, though, and it was getting hot." He climbed back into bed and blew his nose. "So, did you get anywhere with her?" he asked, knowing Gibbs must have seized his opportunity.
"She turned me down," he said, glumly. "You?"
"Same," Jack said, coughing a bit. "God, it doesn't make sense! She should have taken one of us."
"I know."
"I thought she was interested."
"So did I."
"I mean, I've never had a woman be that nice to me unless she wanted to screw me senseless. And that includes me mum."
"Your mum wanted to screw you senseless? Sorry to hear that, mate."
"Ugh, no! I mean she was never that nice to me."
"Well, I'm sorry to hear that too."
"Yeah, well. You feeling any better?"
"I don't know. (sniff) Maybe. You?"
"Not much --uh--ahhh-- ATCHUUMMPPHH!" Jack sneezed.
"Hahh-hahHRSHHCHOOO!" Gibbs sneezed too. Then, in unison:
"AHHHHHHTCHOOOOOO!" They both groaned and mopped their noses.
"Miserable," said Gibbs. "Well (sniff), fancy a game of cards to pass the time?"
"Why not," agreed Jack.
They spent the rest of the day in bed, napping and playing cards. They had no company until late afternoon, when Anna Maria dropped by.
"I've been getting supplies all day," she said, collapsing in a chair across the room. She looked tired and cross. "I think we've got enough of everything to last us awhile. And I went by Guzman's."
"How's it going?" asked Jack.
"Well, it's going to take them a little longer...but then these things always do. He said Friday at the latest. I told him it was all right, but I'll have his balls for breakfast if he tries to charge us any more."
"You'll probably have his balls for breakfast anyway," joked Jack.
"Yeah, didn't you have them last time we were here?" Gibbs joined in.
"Don't start with me. I'm in a foul mood."
"You're always in a foul mood, love, what is it this time?"
She gave him a resentful look. "I've got your bloody cold."
"Awww, poor lass," Jack chuckled. "I'm sorry to hear it."
"Yeah, it's no fun at all," agreed Gibbs. "Got a sore throat, then?"
"Yeah." She rubbed her nose with her sleeve. "And I can't stop sniffling."
"Now that you mention it, I can hear it in your voice," said Jack. "Here, you'd better have some of Mary's medicine."
"I can see it's done you two a lot of good."
"It could have been worse if we hadn't taken it," said Gibbs.
"It could have been better too."
"Oh, come now, be a good lass," Jack said, pouring out a spoonful. Anna Maria rolled her eyes and took her medicine. "Euuurggh, that's awful. Speaking of Mary (sniff), how's the little competition going? Any progress?"
"Nah," said Jack, coughing. "She turned us both down."
"Ah, too bad. I had a feeling, though. You lot were trying too hard." She stood up to go. "Well, I'm going to bed."
"Rest well, love. We'll tell Mary that you're sick. She is a good nurse, even if she's got a cold heart," said Gibbs. She waved a dismissive hand and left. They heard her tired footsteps enter her room, next to theirs. They heard the bed creak, and then a muffled "Atchhhhishhoooo!"
When dinnertime came around, Jack and Gibbs were surprised to find Mavis the serving girl walk through the door with their meals.
"Where's Mary?" asked Jack.
"She's very busy," Mavis said softly, eyes downcast. "She likes to close early on the Sabbath, and it's always a rush to finish up on time." She set down Gibbs' dinner and offered him a shy smile, but he didn't notice.
"Well, how do you like that?" he complained. "She's abandoned us."
"Yeah, I can't think why," Jack said dryly. He himself had not been looking forward to the awkwardness of seeing her after the rejection. But Gibbs just looked grumpy and sullen until he remembered what Mary had said about Mavis.
"Ah--thank you, love," he said, summoning up a smile. Her face lit up and she quickly ducked out of the room. Gibbs shook his head. There was no understanding anything when it came to matters of the heart.
When Anna Maria awoke from her nap, it was dark out and she felt worse. Everything ached, and she felt little chills scamper over her, even though it was warm. Her nose tickled fiercely and before she could find the handkerchief she'd taken to bed with her, she sneezed. "EhhhTSHICHHH! Heh-heh-hehhhhTCHISHHHH! ItchISHHH! ITCHOOOOO! (Snrrff) Ohhhh, (sniff) by head..." she moaned, wiping her nose with the back of her hand before finally finding the crumpled hankie. She blew her nose and then flopped back down on the mattress. After a while, she heard a knock on the door.
"Come in," she called.
Mary opened the door, smiling sympathetically.
"Hi Mary," she said sheepishly. "I guess I'm sick too."
"So I heard. I came up earlier to check on you, but you were asleep and I didn't want to wake you. Sleep's the best cure." She sat on the bed and placed a gentle hand on the younger woman's cheek. "You're a bit feverish. How do you feel?"
"Not so well. My nose is running, my throat hurts, my head hurts, I'm sneezing..."
"Poor dear. Are you hungry, love?"
"Not really."
"Well, you need to eat something. I set you aside some dinner; I'll go down and get it."
Soon she returned with a delicious looking dinner, making Anna realize she was hungrier than she'd thought.
"And this is a bit of medicine for that cold," Mary said, handing Anna Maria a large, steaming mug of something. Expecting more bitter herbs, she put it to her lips with trepidation, but discovered instead a delicious concoction of vanilla, spices, sugar and what had to be very expensive rum.
"Ohh, Mary! You do know how to make a girl feel better!" She was not sure, but she thought she saw Mary blush at the praise.
"Thank you. Well, um, I'm done with work for the night...we close early on Sundays...would you--would you like some company?"
"Certainly," said Anna Maria, noting the tavern mistress' shyness. Curious... "But since you're off work, you've got to help me with this rum, I can't drink it all."
"Oh, no, that's all right..."
"Come on, you need it, as a preventative. You've been hanging around all us sick people, you're bound to catch it next." She scooted over in bed and motioned Mary to sit down.
"I shouldn't," said Mary, nonetheless accepting the drink and curling up next to Anna Maria.
"Yes, you should. You work too ha--hard...HitchOOOO! IIITTCHOOO! (sniff) You need to relax once in a while. Come on, drink up."
"All right," said Mary, taking a draught. "And, God bless you."
"Thanks. You must get tired of saying that."
"Not at all. So how are Jack and Gibbs? I haven't gotten a chance to look in on them since this afternoon."
"As well as can be expected, with broken hearts and all."
"Oh, God!" laughed Mary. "What did they tell you?"
"Just that you turned them down. They're crushed," Anna Maria teased. Mary rolled her eyes.
"Crushed, indeed. Well, they must be used to it, going around propositioning anything female that crosses their paths."
"Is that what you think?"
"Well, of course, all these sailors are the same way."
"Mary, it's not like that. They really like you. They've each been trying to edge the other out. Do you want to know a secret?"
"What's that?"
"Jack'll kill me if I tell you."
"What?"
"Well, you know how he was getting better, and then woke up feverish again this morning?"
"I know, I feel terrible about it. I should have kept him in bed. I think maybe I was too eager for him to get better because I was getting so busy, and with Gibbs sick--"
"No, no, it's not your fault, I promise you. Since he was feeling better, he was afraid that would give Gibbs the advantage--so last night he got the idea to go out in the rain to make his cold worse again."
"He didn't!"
"He did!" Anna Maria laughed. "So he goes out and gets soaked, and begins to think it's a bad idea. But when he tries to get back in, it's already locked! He had to stand out there throwing pebbles at my window until I came to let him in." Anna Maria was breaking up laughing, but Mary was appalled.
"You have to be joking! Oh, I could kill him!"
"You see, Mary? He was desperate for your attention! Both of them were."
"Well, I don't understand it," she said, truly perplexed. "I'm a grandmother, for God's sake. Shouldn't they be chasing after someone younger, or at least beautiful?"
"But you are beautiful, Mary. Don't you know that?" Mary dropped her gaze, and this time Anna Maria was sure of it: the woman was blushing. Anna Maria touched the other woman's cheek. "You should look in a mirror sometime. Preferably full length," she added, with an appreciative glance at Mary's curves. Mary blushed and didn't know what to say, but was saved when Anna Maria succumbed to a fit of sneezing.
"God bless you. Oh, I'd almost forgotten, I brought you some extra handkerchiefs. Jack and Gibbs have been going through dozens, and I expect you will too."
"Thanks, love." She blew her nose at length. "Oh God, but my head hurts (sniff)." She rubbed her temples.
"Poor lass," she sympathized. "Here, let me do that." She reached over and began massaging the cold-stricken woman's head. Anna sighed and turned around to afford Mary a better angle. After a bit Anna Maria leaned back until she was cuddled up against her friend. She smiled inwardly as she saw the color rise in Mary's cheeks out of the corner of her eye. Interesting, as Jack would say.
"You're so good at this," Anna Maria said, eyes closed and enjoying Mary's loving touch. "You know, that's another reason these men are falling all over you."
"What's that?"
"Well, you're so caring. You always take care of everybody, and you do it well."
"Seems they'd think of me more as a mother than a lover."
"It's the same thing, sometimes. And deep down, these pirates are all just little boys who miss their mothers." She blew her nose again, then settled more deeply into Mary's embrace. "You must have been a wonderful mother."
"Well, I don't know if my daughter would agree," she chuckled. "I'm too much for her, really. Sometimes I think that's why she married so young, to get away from me."
"Oh, that can't be. I thought you said you were close."
"We are, but we fight all the time. We missed each other terribly when her husband took her here, and she was overjoyed when I came to help her with the baby. But after three months of my living there, she said to me, `Mum, I love you very dearly. And if you stay here much longer, we'll both end up in the madhouse.'"
"Why's that?"
"I'm too overbearing, I've got too much mothering in me for just one child. By all rights, I should have had a dozen children, but that's not what God had in mind," she sighed. "Anyway, she was right, and bless her, she was kind about it. She helped me find this place, and now I'm close enough to visit her and my grandchildren and help out, but not so close that we get on each other's nerves."
"But what about your husband?" asked Anna Maria. She moved her hand to rest on Mary's upper thigh, and heard a slow, soft intake of breath. "Don't you miss him?"
"Oh--every once in a while. He's a good man, but I never--you know--"
"You never loved him?" Anna Maria began stroking Mary's thigh casually.
"No..."
"And don't you ever take a lover?"
"I--well--"
"You should take a lover." Mary's massage had stopped, and Anna Maria sat up and switched position so that she was held close against Mary's side. She stroked Mary's hair fondly. "I think you must be a very passionate woman underneath that proper exterior. Why did you turn Jack and Gibbs down? Don't you like them?"
"I do like them," Her voice trembled ever so slightly. "They're good men, it's just --it's just that--"
"...they're men?"
Blushing fiercely and unable to speak, she nodded. Anna Maria trailed a finger down Mary's chest and held her closer.
"And you don't fancy men, do you, Mary?"
Mary shook her head, unable to look at Anna Maria. Anna Maria cupped Mary's breast in her hand and leaned in close so that her breath whispered against Mary's ear.
"Tell me, Mary...do you fancy me?"
"Yes," she replied, trembling. She found Anna Maria's waiting lips and kissed her passionately. "Oh yes."
The two women became lost in each other's kisses. Anna Maria's bold hands caressed Mary's curves, and then slipped under her blouse, her skirt. She paused to catch a sneeze in her handkerchief, blew her nose, and resumed kissing her new lover.
"Oh, I shouldn't, you're sick, you have a fever..." Mary said, even as she continued to devour the pirate lass with kisses.
"It's all right. The best way to get your mind off a bad cold is a good tumble... with a beautiful woman." This seemed to release Mary's last inhibitions, and she rolled over so that she was on top of Anna Maria, pinning her gently to the bed and kissing her fiercely. Mary's hand lifted her lover's skirt and stroked her skin, slipping between her thighs and teasing her sex with a delicate touch. Anna Maria moaned appreciatively. The woman knew what she was doing. Anna Maria began to undress her lover, who returned the favor. Mary's kisses rained on her breasts, her belly, and soon on the sensitive regions below. Anna Maria gasped and clutched the bedclothes. The woman really knew what she was doing. It was obvious that Mary had acted upon her preferences before; how on earth had she been able to keep them quiet? Poor Jack and Gibbs, she thought with a smile, as the bed frame began bumping the wall between their rooms. Well, better to let them know late than never...
Jack and Gibbs were waking up from another doze, when Jack noticed the rhythmic noise behind him.
"Hey, Gibbs, listen," said Jack. Gibbs stopped loudly blowing his nose to comply, and then broke into a grin. "Sounds like Anna found someone to make her feel better."
"Well at least one of us is having some fun," Gibbs commented, wiping his red nose. Then he sneezed-- "ATISSSHOOO"--and had to blow all over again. "Who do you suppose it is? That red-haired fellow in Knuckles' crew?"
"I don't know." They listened for a while, and heard Anna Maria's muffled moan, coupled with a distinctly feminine gasp.
"Aha..." said Gibbs.
"One of the serving maids, then," said Jack, taking out a handkerchief to dab at his own red, swollen nose. "Sarah, maybe?"
"I don't think so...the voice is too low..." Gibbs said, with a troubled look. "That--that sounds like--"
"Mary?!!" they gasped. They leapt up and each pressed an ear to the wall.
"It can't be her," whispered Gibbs. "It must be someone else."
"It sounds like her,"
As if on cue, Anna Maria's ecstatic voice floated through the wall. "Oh, Mary, Mary, Mary!"
"She's doing that on purpose!" Jack said with narrowed eyes. He made a noise of frustration. "I didn't know Mary liked girls. Did you know she liked girls?" asked Jack.
"No..."
"How come we didn't know that?"
"I don't know." They were speechless for a while as the muffled sounds of love continued. Then Gibbs asked, "Do you suppose she only likes girls?"
"Well of course. Why else would she have turned us both down?"
"True."
"It's the only explanation."
"It is." They both sank back down to their beds. They listened--they couldn't help it. Jealous as they were, they were still men, and every gasp filled their heads with tantalizing images of their beloved Mary in the arms of their beautiful crewmate. And the women showed no signs of slowing down.
"Ah, God, I can't take this," Jack said finally. He looked imploringly at Gibbs. "Do you want to...?"
"Yeah, all right," Gibbs agreed after a moment's consideration.
"Thanks, Gibbs. I know it's not your favorite thing," he said, as his first mate got out of his bed and moved over to Jack's.
"Well, I know I'm not your favorite thing," he chuckled. While Jack enjoyed the company of men much more than Gibbs, he preferred them young and beautiful, like Will Turner. "Move over."
Jack did, and they sighed as their hands found each other's achingly stiff members. Then Jack's nose tickled. "Uhhh...ATCHOOO!" he sneezed, spraying the air in front of him.
"Bless you," said Gibbs, enjoying his captain's practiced stroking as Mary and Anna Maria's sounds of pleasure serenaded them. "I guess neither of us get what we really want tonight."
"No," agreed Jack, as his first mate quickened his rhythm. "We'll just have to lie back ...and think of Mary."
The End
Characters belong to Disney or whoever did POTC--not making $ here