Exeunt Beatrice & Benedick
a Much Ado About Nothing story
by Superimmunegirl


Beatrice: It is thy wedding night and still thou dost
Maintain the soldier's art: thou makest war.

Benedick: How now, my love?

Beatrice: The armies of dancing feet
Advance upon all sides and thou dost crush them.

Benedick: I have not the heart to jibe with thee this eve,
Nor, it would seem, the head.

Beatrice: Thou dost admit defeat? Ay me,
That day I thought would never come!
But come, since I'm a gentle conqueror,
Yield up to me my tribute with thy lips. (kisses him)
Thou'rt warm.

Benedick: It is thy kisses that have made me so.

Beatrice: Perhaps `tis true that they have made thee hot;
I fear my late distemper thou hast caught.

Benedick: No, no, my love, `tis cupid's fire alone
That burns in me and sets my cheeks aflame,
That lets me have no peace save in thine arms,
Dear Beatrice--(sneezes several times)

Beatrice: O bravely spoke! But though thy words proclaim
Thy health, thy nose gives thee the lie.
Many are the pangs of love, I vow,
But sneezing ne'er is reckon'd among them.
I'faith, love, thou'rt ill.

Benedick: No, forsooth, I--(sneezes several times)
Ah, thou wilt mock at me.

Beatrice: Beshrew my jests, that thou wouldst think it!
No, though I am merry, I am kind.
Thy love has gentled me, dear Benedick.
I'll take thee to thy bed and nurse thy cold,
As befits thy wife.

Benedick: There's more that would
Befit thee, and still strength I have for that.
Good Beatrice, I yield to thy physick.

Exeunt Beatrice & Benedick


Well, challenge # 75 was this: Plot Bunny Idea: Take one of those serious books, movies or even comics, a classic or just something that doesn't invite a fannish response, the kind you'd analyze in your M.A. Take the kind of book you'd never dream of writing a sneezefic on... and do just that.
I'm usually pretty immune to bunny nibbles. but this one got me! I thought of Shakespeare, and the idea of sneezefic in iambic pentameter seemed too good to resist.